Sometimes I Wonder What’s Wrong With Me And Then I Realize It’s Me

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Posted 27 Apr 2011 in Uncategorized

“Sometimes I wonder what’s wrong with me and then I realize that NOTHING’S WRONG WITH ME I’M OKAY YOU’RE OKAY EXCEPT THAT I’M A MEAN SON OF A CHICKEN PATTY.”

I’m feeling fine. I just ate a half a bar of chocolate with some whiskey.  Just a little bit.  Writing workshop was interesting.  It’s the last day before our class reading on Saturday and everyone is feeling the pressure, like a pair of thumbs in the neck.  However, I think it’s going to be a fun night.  A few of my students have been taking my suggestions as suggestions not commands, and I had some fun ranting today and using the words “obey me” just for kicks.  I’m actually okay with people finding their own path, but I do think sometimes you should trust someone else to look out for your own good.  That said, I think everyone has changed / grown a little over the course of the last eight weeks.  Reawakened their creative instincts, or started to look things more closely in the process of trying to represent experience in writing.

As for myself, I almost had a heart attack (as usual) becoming Mindy Chiu and sending out personalized spam this morning.  It’s something that I haven’t done in a long time.  The last time I did it, was probably three years ago. Maybe longer.  Yeah longer.  I’ve written about it repeatedly since then. . .in the process of seeking grant funding for my alter-ego.  Weird enough.

There’s a very specific kind of feeling when you’re sending an email that is meant to be experienced in a personal way to a group of people being addressed simultaneously.  It’s the equivalent of playing a live concert.  You’re addressing the group, the collective body, but you’re hoping to connect with everyone in the audience as individuals, too.  If I think of it like that, it doesn’t sound so screwed up, but that’s sometimes how I really feel after trying to write in such a manner.  It’s a high level exercise in syntax, diction, and grammer.  There is not a millisecond of text / mental sound that goes unexamined.  Afterwords, I feel like I’ve just accomplished some feat of astro-physics.  And it’s email.  Very confounding.

This blog is so boring I’m going to bed.


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